Tuesday, February 28, 2012

For a flicker of a moment!

Yes, for a fleeting moment, I thought I might be.....pregnant! I was - shocked. Excited beyond, beyond - they said I couldn't conceive. And of course terrified - I mean, I am 50! I hadn't thought much about ole "Flo" not visiting, however, over the holidays I realized she hadn't paid a visit in a really long time. She had a standing reservation! I was hurt, then relieved, then worried. I started visualizing and imagining that I just might be...... dare I say the word?!? It would explain the extra poundage I was carrying too. I didn't speak a word of it to Jeff. Not to anyone. I bought a home pregnancy test and took the test while Jeff was running errands. I needed time to process everything in the event I was.... you know. I waited anxiously for the test results, only to feel a certain sadness when I looked at the stick and it was negative. Weeks went by and still no visit from "Flo". I scheduled an appointment with my doctor the end of December for a pregnancy test - those tests too came back negative, but I learned I was in another phase of life. The "Magical" time as they refer to it. Something about it made me sad. Not that I was going through the change, but this was it. It was final.

1 comment:

likeschocolate said...

Sorry! I haven't gone through the change yet, but I suppose it is probably weird because all our lives we hate having menstration but then when we don't have it anymore it is bittersweet because that part of our life has now come to an end.