Saturday, July 26, 2008

Mean old Mom



DON'T MESS WITH MOM



The Child's Comments and Thoughts

My son came home from school one day, with a smirk upon his face.
He decided he was smart enough, to put me in my place.

Guess what I learned in Civics Two, that's taught by Mr. Wright?
It's all about the laws today, The 'Children's Bill of Rights.

It says I need not clean my room, don't have to cut my hair.
No one can tell me what to think, or speak, or what to wear.

I have freedom from religion, and regardless what you say,
I don't have to bow my head, and I sure don't have to pray.

I can wear earrings if I want, and pierce my tongue &nose.
I can read &watch just what I like, get tattoos from head to toe.

And if you ever spank me, I'll charge you with a crime.
I'll back up all my charges, with the marks on my behind.

Don't you ever touch me, my body's only for my use,
not for your hugs and kisses, that's just more child abuse.

Don't preach about your morals, like your Mama did to you.
That's nothing more than mind control, And it's illegal too!

Mom, I have these children's rights, so you can't influence me,
or I'll call Children's Services Division, better known as C.S.D.'

Mom's Reply and Thoughts

Of course my first instinct was to toss him out the door.
But the chance to teach him a lesson made me think a little more.

I mulled it over carefully, I couldn't let this go.
A smile crept upon my face, he's messing with a pro.

Next day I took him shopping at the local Goodwill Store.
I told him, 'Pick out all you want, there's shirts &pants galore.

I've called and checked with C.S.D. who said they didn't care
if I bought you K-Mart shoes instead of those Nike Airs.

I've canceled that appointment to take your driver's test.
The C.S.D. is unconcerned so I'll decide what's best.

I said 'No time to stop and eat, or pick up stuff to munch.
And tomorrow you can start to learn to make your own sack lunch.

Just save the raging appetite, and wait till dinner time.
We're having liver and onions, a favorite dish of mine.

He asked 'Can I please rent a movie, to watch on my VCR?
'Sorry, but I sold your TV, for new tires on my car.

I also rented out your room, you'll take the couch instead.
The C.S.D. requires just a roof over your head.

Your clothing won't be trendy now, I'll choose what we eat.
That allowance that you used to get, will buy me something neat.

I'm selling off your jet ski, dirt-bike &roller blades.
Check out the 'Parents Bill of Rights, It's in effect today!

Hey hot shot, are you crying, Why are you on your knees?
Are you asking God to help you out, instead of C.S.D..?

This will be soooo me and I'm so serious! *snort*

from a Loving Mom

(Mean Old Mother.)

16 comments:

Pixel Fairy Princess said...

LOL! These are good :D
Ladybug hugs,
;D

redmaryjanes said...

Oh yes...my kids know better than to throw any of that at me : ). They know I hold the power over everything they hold most dear...car, x-box, playstation, cell phone.

CQ-VN~mama said...

AMEN! Count me in the Mean Mommy Club! Natalie's favorite saying right now is......"I don't want to!". This really frustrated me until one day, when I was really tired. I had asked her to do something and she said I don't want to. Before for I had time to think, I said "I didn't ask you if you WANTED to do it......just DO IT!" She blinked, and then went and did it. No complaints. AH....Mean Mommy at her finest!!!

Amyesq said...

OH yes! I am definitely one of the mean mommies too. That would totally be me. In fact, my kids are pretty screwed anyway with my being a lawyer and all. Just let them try to negotiate. :)

Snowflowers Mum said...

mean mommies unite...I'm a kiwi, we dont put up with that kind of rubbish. Okay the spanking is actually illegal, but they are only HALF kiwi, so that means I can still smack their bums if needed!

Isabella's Mommy and Daddy said...

I remember Colton said to me a long time ago.. when he was smaller...
"I will call the police if you do that ..." I sent him to his room...
So I made him pack a suitcase.. and I took him down to the police station and the policeman talked to him and then Guess what....
HE NEVER has said that again...
LOL..
I think I might have taught him a lesson..LOL..
Have a Great Week..
Hugs..

DAVID AND AMY VENN'S WEBSITE said...

I love it!! I am a high school Latin teacher and I see some of the snotty nose kids come through and I wish I could use some of those tactics on the kids, Lord knows that there parents are not seeing who there kids are becoming until it is too late and then they call the school crying and asking for help for the issues they are just seeing that I have been witnessing months ago when I call them to warn them...they just never to bother to take me seriously until it was too late. The rule to dealing with teenagers is to not tolerate such behavior when they are tots!! I promise that is the key!!
Amy

DAVID AND AMY VENN'S WEBSITE said...

Their... I know it should be their parents and not "there" parents....after a couple glasses of wine...typing and grammar are such a chore. lol
Amy

Itty Bitty Ladybug said...

I LOVE this! I even read it to my son this morning.

Did you read that UF was ranked No. 1 party school by the Princeton Review?

kerri said...

Hilarious, I have been called "Mean Mommy", LOL.
I don't and won't put up with the crap, want to avoid those teens that have no respect for anyone. It really upsets me to see teens that treat their parents like a cash cow and talk to them like their garbage...

Mr.Brian said...

A big AMEN to that sister!!!!!

I see some kids who are so spoiled and all you hear is I want I need.
I say send their little hinders to a place like Hattai and then see if they think they have it so darn bad.I just watched a video at church about Hattai and it made me so sad to see these kids eating "ashes" yea I said ashes for food.
and kids now days will complain what (insert any food) again???

I could go on and on here,it burns my big fat round back side when I think of it.
Hmmm maybe I should do a post on
gratitude. Hope you are having a great summer.
If you ever talk to crazy lady any more send her my greetings.So sad she had stalkers that made he go into hiding.
BTW, your little twins are so darn cute, did you ever imagine how entertaining you life could become with kids?
Hugs,
Mr.Brian
Ohh Ohhh if Steffie see's I am sending you hugs to there may be problems,she does not like to share me.LOLOL!

Mimi said...

so witty! I love this. Now that's thinking.

Kathryn said...

Love this!!!!!!!!! and I really love the new look of the blog very pretty!!!!!!!!!!! Your girls are so beautiful and so is mommy too!!!

Isabella's Mommy and Daddy said...

Great NEW LOOK..
LOVE It..
Have a Great Weekend....
HUGS..

Sharie said...

LOVE LOVE LOVE the new look!

Fliss and Mike Adventures said...

Love the mean old mum bit... that is me... I will smack their butts if need be and if they don't' like it.. oh well... loving the new look... take care...